whatever

2 seconds

2 seconds to change a man's life.

A noisy fly and other friends

I don't normally do this, but this hits me at a level equivalent to Narnia, so I gotta bitch.

Yesterday I went to a church wedding. Now I believe in God, but he's not Jesus. So there was a mild conflict of interest as I spent a hazy Saturday afternoon in His House. But my friend was exchanging marriage vows and what-nots, so I shelved my discomfort aside and came to offer my best wishes. Afterall, the previous church wedding I attended was a warm rosy affair, and I imagined this the same.

How wrong I was.

First of all, the pastor was very very annoying. He pretended to be the star attraction of the event, rather than the couple about to marry. In his monotonous mumbling voice, he delivered a lecture on love, loving and lovingness and all and it was so dam nauseating. I counted the word love a total of 3000 times in his speech of 30 minutes. Like a fly dancing around in a pile of decaying flesh, he kept zipping and zapping and yapping non-stop. And the worse part was, the trophy speech he delivered, a girl translated it into chinese for the sake of all those who mercifully missed it.

Real thoughful. I can't speak for everyone in the audience, but I had wanted him to Nike the solemnization. The bleddy fool refused to just do it.

We waited and waited and waited. After a whole 60 mins, he reluctantly exited the centre-stage. Finally the wheels creaked and the event went its way to a photo taking session. A quick snap of people close to the bride and groom for memorial's sake, ya? It should all go pretty, till the order of appearance flashed onto a powerpoint slide across the church wall. If I remembered correctly, the order went a little like this:

1. Groom's relatives
2. Bride's relatives
3. Groom's chuch friends
4. Bride's church friends
5. Groom's colleagues
6. Bride's colleagues
7. Groom's other friends
8. Bride's other friends

Naturally I fell into category no. 8. I confess, I'm not really close to the bride. But some of my friends knew her for 10 plus years, and they helped with her wedding and they still fell into no. 8 (Bride's other friends). Again, I don't know how they feel, but I'm really glad to see where I stand when it comes to this friendship.

Thanks for the clarification. I believe this is how racial discrimination got started.

no way

many faces

What is this User Guide meant for?

I have chosen. My life, my drawing, my writings, my runnings, all are meant for talking to the child inside. He, who has so much things to say, but knows not how to say. Madness, I know. This sounds like madness. And sometimes, I do wonder if I am schizoid :b. But I am me. So that's that.

"Sometimes an uncontrollable feeling of sadness grips us, he says. We recognize that the magic moment of the day has passed and that we've done nothing about it. Life begins to conceal its magic and its art.

We have to listen to the child we once are, the child who still exists inside us. That child understands magic moments. We can stifle its cries, but we cannot silence its voice.

The child we once were is still there. Blessed are the children, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

If we are not reborn - if we cannot learn to look at life with the innocence and enthusiasm of childhood - it makes no sense to go on living.

There are many ways to commit suicide. Those who try to kill the body violate God's law. Those who try to kill the soul also violate God's law, even though their crime is less visible to others.

We have to pay attention to what the child in our heart tells us. We should not be embarrased by this child. We must not allowed this child to be scared because this child is alone and is almost never heard.

We must allow this child the take the reins of our lives. The child knows that each day is different from every other day.

We have to allow it to feel loved again. We must please the child - even if this means that we act in ways we are not used to, in ways that may seem foolish to others.

Remember human wisdom is madness in the eyes of God. But if we listen to the child who lives in our soul, our eyes will grow bright. If we do not lose contact with that child, we will not lose contact with life."

- Paulo Coelho, By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept